Perpetual Energy

2 to 8 players | Reviewed by GrindSpire - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 6:48pm

‘Hello, is that the UN, oh good. I’d like to make a charge against an individual named SaTaNiX. Yes, I would like to charge him with a crime against humanity. I need proof you say, well, I have a map he made called Perpetual Energy, that should do.’

That is roughly what SHOULD have happened having played this map, it really so bad it could count as a crime against humanity. The level is made up of a central room with every weapon except the super shotgun in it which then has two connecting rooms containing hideously large amounts of rockets and nails, a megahealth per room, and then either a pentagram or a quad damage. The rooms are all connected in a straight line, so connectivity could be roughly described as ‘shit’.

The texturing of the level is simple, bright blue walls, bright yellow floor and a few dark blue metallic ramps. That is it, it is so appallingly bad that a terminally retarded badger with a flaming, hairy, weasel shaped dildo stuffed up its left nostril so that it protrudes from its ear, could have done better. And to add to the shit curdling depravity of the theme, everything is almost fullbright, with a couple of slightly darker bits thrown in. Lighting comes from either flame holders, appears from thin air or is produced by those crap light globe things.

To give the author credit though, he did try, he made some nice invisible platforms from clip brushes on which to rest the pent and quad on. But in this case, why the hell didn’t he clip the jutting out door frames that keep impeding progress down the disgustingly bright corridors? The map plays as god awfully as it looks, with everyone just cramming into the central room, firing a couple of times, respawning in an outer room, then repeating. Basically, this map is actually worse than Saving Private Ryan, it is so shit that quite frankly, I find the prospect of having sex with a grunt more attractive than having to play this pile of shit one more time. Do NOT, under any circumstances, get it. Ever.

0.0 out of 5.0

Download 46Kb - 955 downloads | readme | SaTaNiX | Author Site

#1. LOL! ^

by Shambler - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 6:54am (

This is how bad maps should be reviewed =)

#2. PAUL! ^

by GrindSpire - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 7:45am (

We need an icon if something gets 0/5!

#3. zero icon ^

by Fernologist - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 12:21pm (

It looks like Paul tried to put one in the "Two Castles" review but it's always been a broken link for me.

#4. Is it a blast party? ^

by QuakeMapDesigner - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 1:30pm (


I can't stay sitting here and see how a review is done about a map that someone
will get power to make other one, and learn of mistake and stuff. This map was
made in 15 min. so of course there is 15 min. of effort in that one. Is the review
needed a certain amount of hours of work ?

It's totally unfair for the different mapping skills of people. It should have divided
in 2 area. Once people send a map, the first thing should be to allow the map to
the proper area. Also, review should be more polite. If a compagny can't say the
word "shit", it should be the same for the review. GrindSpire you are in a position
of authority here as a reviewer and you should act as a mature person in your
review. But you can't act as a mature person if you not, right?

For the review, let me tell you my review of this map: I played that map with SaTaNiX and one thing for sure and you can't denied, this map is a winner for
what you all call the r_speeds and amount of polygons (that's is my major
problems in all the maps i do). About textures, it is impossible that you see
bright spickles ( or pickle's) everywhere because those textures were not made
custom by SaTaNiX and were done for a non-glquake environement. This map
doesn't have a full goodies junk everywhere you can jump on them and walk
on them, so this also respect all those Quake maps for serious gamers. The
game play would be better if probably SaTaNiX would put more min. and hours. Adding multiple sidewalk different height.

In the near futur, SaTaNiX will probably add more time in his work and get better
look with a better choice of textures.

My final word would be: " People needs to know what they have to do to get better by having a reviews and not getting fireblasted. Am here to encourage
people like him, me, to still love editing and continue to do what we love the

Cheers SaTaNiX,

"where imagination means Levels"

#5. Low scores... ^

by Asriel - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 1:37pm (

may encourage you to do better, during the process (heh) of making a map - or depress you.


#6. well... ^

by BARiUM - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 2:09pm (

...if he is stupid enough to release this pile of junk, he deserves the review...

this map should be shift+deleted

#7. hihihi ^

by maiden - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 2:51pm (


#8. Actually ^

by GrindSpire - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 3:25pm (

A review is there to inform people about the map. And I don't give a fuck if he spent 3 years on it, it still plays like a pile of shit. Time mapping means fuck all.

And of course it has low r_speeds, it is a fucking box map.

I never said that I got white speckles, I said it was too bright, there is a difference.

And I would act as a mature person, but this does not deserve any respect, it is shit. And it WAS submitted to the site, SaTaNiX chose to submit it, I didn't go looking for it.

So please, in respect of your amazing stupidity, SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU RETARD!

#9. Ok, thanks... ^

by satanix - Saturday 2nd December 2000 @ 9:34pm (

Thanks for the review. I don`t care if you call it shit, because I know I can do better. The level does not play good with bots (which you probably used). It plays very well with humans. I know the gameplay is linear, but who says you have to cram 16 or more players in it? It was made for a private server (if any), which usually only houses 8 players. Just putting in some clarities, and the lighting, I can do better, I know. And the doorways, mistake I guess. I wanted to see response on those. Next map you won`t as so angry towards it. I kind of expected a low score anyway.



(Thanks to all who pleasantly put down a mapper, thanks for the self-esteem boost, and possibly even some encouragement. I`ll be sure to personally thank you if I ever meet up with you.)

#10. no problem! ^

by Spanish Weird - Sunday 3rd December 2000 @ 12:26am (

Whats the matter with you people, don't you recognize genius when it cocks it's leg & pees in your face?

SaTaNiX, woah d00d you cleary have some serious talent in the old box map department so don't let these jealous pricks get you down.

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